Partying With Dude
by Octavia Delitian
Summary: Dude, the magnificent hero, takes Ghortarius out to party and meet human females as he promised. Set in the Two Worlds II epilogue. Featuring Reesa.


It was time to party like Ghortarius had never partied before. Actually that was not just a figure of speech since the Orc mage had been a too serious and studious youth to ever enjoy himself. So many of his race had been slain that the remaining ones found little reason to celebrate, but now the bad times might at last be coming to an end. It was time to party like Ghortarius had never partied before!

He dressed himself in a concealing robe with a deep hood and even bathed, so that he would not be attracting unwanted attention from people who had a problem with Orcs. "You can do this, old chap," he told himself several times before Dude arrived to his quarters and they stepped into the teleport together. They were going to Cheznaddar, a place with surprisingly little cheese in it. Dude said Ghortarius would fit right in with the crowd there.

Dude was still sporting a few bruises and scars from his first close encounter with Dar Pha. He should be happy to get away with his life, being a soft-skinned human. Orc females were rough mistresses, and Gortharius did not at all feel up for spending time with one. Soft. Yes, that was what he was after. A soft human female. Dude was used to getting around with human females, sweeping them right off their feet with his godlike charisma. At least that was what he had told Ghortarius.

"This place is a dump," Ghortarius commented as they walked down the street towards the open tavern.

"The perfect place to introduce you to. You will fit right in."

Ghortarius cleared his throat, wishing there was a discrete way to thump Dude over the head with his staff, but there were guards everywhere. He was not going to get himself arrested before he could even have any fun.

They sat down at a table and Dude went to order beer for both of them. While he was gone, Ghortarius appreciated the view as a group of females were dancing to the music

"Can you play an instrument, Dude?" Ghortarius asked.

"I can play all instruments. Even those I've never heard of. I am a musical god. Why do you ask?"

"It seems to be a sure way to attract females, as you can see."

"Ah, yes. We can save that for later, though. Plan B."

"What is plan A?"

"Here's your beer, now excuse me for a second..." Dude disappeared once more and Ghortarius did not really mind as he at least had something nice to rest his eyes on. It did spark a question though: Would any of them actually go near an Orc or would they scream and send the guards on him? If anyone was going to be impaled tonight it was certainly not _him_! He really hoped that Dude knew what he was doing.

"Ghortarius! Meet my friend Reesa!" Dude said when he returned with a scantily clad human.

"Oh, very nice to meet you, Reesa!" Ghortarius said, but leaned close to Dude to whisper in his ear. "She kinda looks like a dude. Are you sure about her gender?"

"She is a fully functional female. I have tried her out, don't worry."

"That is reassuring. I'm not sure if she is what I was looking for, though."

"Seriously, Ghortarius, I doubt you'll get lucky with anyone else. Maybe you'll learn a thing or two and get someone better in the future, but this female can take care of herself, so you won't break her because you have no clue about what you're doing. Also, she told me that the idea of doing an Orc is kinky. She's almost yours already. All I can't do for you is give her a good impression of you."

The mage sighed. "I suppose you're right."

"What are you two whispering about?" Reesa asked and sat down on the chair next to Ghortarius, her skirt hiking up even more than while she was standing and covering close to nothing. "Me?" Her already wide mouth became even wider with a perverted smile stretching it out, Ghortarius noted. Well, at least she was soft. All humans were.

"Yeah, we were just fighting about who would get the honor to buy you a drink, but I believe I was beaten by Ghortarius," Dude said.

"Ah, yes... what can I get you?" the Orc mage resisted the urge to give Dude a thankful smile.

"I want... wine. Red wine."

"I'll go get it for you," Dude said and left the two alone after Ghortarius handed him the coins he needed for the purchase.

"So, you're an Orc," Reesa said.

"Yup." Now what on earth would they even talk about? "I hope I'm not coming on too strong here but, may I touch your skin?"

"Maybe if you answer me a question first."

"Go ahead."

"How big is it?"

"You mean...?"

"Your... manhood. Or is it Orchood? I'd like to know before I make up my mind about you."

"Er... could we take this somewhere more discrete later maybe? You can look all you want then, as long as no one else does."

"Oh, didn't Dude tell you about my conditions?"

"What conditions?"

But right then Dude returned with a bottle of wine and even more beer. "Here you go!" He threw himself into a chair and picked up his tankard. "Did I miss anything?"

"Er... no," Ghortarius said.

"Liar!" Dude said. "Reesa, just imagine a big cucumber and I think you're not far off either in shape or color."

"What the..." Ghortarius looked away and took a gulp of beer.

"Well, Ghortarius has agreed to join us to my place later."

Ghortarius blinked. Dude was coming as well? Were humans usually doing this kind of thing? If Dar Pha found out she might not be so gentle with him the next time they met.

When they all had a drink in front of them Dude raised his tankard. "This first drink goes to Azhar, a damn good fellow who died, and then died for real. Cheers to him!"

They kept drinking. To Dude, to Ghortarius, to Reesa, to Dude, to Professor Kaineth, to Gandohar, to Dude, to Nalia, to Eric, to Dude, to Gorgeous Georgie, to Dude... and after that Dude left the table to join the musician. Producing a violin seemingly out of nowhere, he played White River perfectly and brought tears to many sensitive people in the audience.

It was well past midnight when Ghortarius merrily followed the humans back to Reesa's house. He regretted drinking as much as he did when he had to crawl over a plank between two houses to get there, though. Dude and Reesa walked over as if it was nothing. Maybe it was because he was a mage that his brain was so easily thrown off balance like this, and the rest of him with it.

The conditions that Reesa had mentioned, it turned out, was that Ghortarius had to make out with Dude in front of her before he could get near her. It was certainly not what he came for, but he had to admit that he had pretty soft lips for a dude.

Then the moment finally came and Ghortarius dropped his pants. Reesa gave thumbs up and asked Dude to sit outside for a while and look at the stars or something. When they were done, Ghortarius discretely placed a personal teleport platform on a rooftop nearby before going back home to his chambers in Alsorna. Sure, she was not the ideal human female, but as Dude had put it, those would not put out for an Orc.

Now Ghortarius had finally partied like Ghortarius had never partied before.


End file.
